Molly Shattuck

It seems to me the case of Molly Shattuck, culminating in the 2014-11 rape charge,
raises a number of issues.

Below are a number of news articles about this phenomenal case.

If you wonder when she and her then-husband Mayo Shattuck separated,
the answer is: before March 13, 2014 (see also).
Thus her relation with the 15-year old described below happened
after her separation.
I mention that because at least one news story contains the following:
[Ms.] Shattuck reportedly began flirting with the 15-year-old via Instagram
in May,
four months before her millionaire husband, Mayo Shattuck, 60,
filed for divorce,
according to The Baltimore Sun, which cited a Baltimore County court affidavit.


Court records showed Shattuck's husband,
who was the longtime chairman of a Baltimore-based energy company
before switching to his current role of chairman of a Chicago-based energy corporation,
filed for divorce two days before that home search [on October 1, 2014].
It seems to me that it is misleading to omit that they were already separated
when she, allegedly, began flirting with the young man not her husband.

Numerous articles below refer to the 15-year-old as a "boy",
e.g. the Baltimore Sun editorial calls him "an adolescent boy".
This is not the universally approved way of referring to 15-year-old males.
Other standard terms are:
"young man" (this was the usual way in my youth, circa 1960)
"young adult" (libraries have "Young Adult" sections;
when I inquired what age range made one a "young adult",
I was told it was 12 to 18, i.e., middle and high school)
"minor" (this is a legal term, normally meaning below the age of 18)
"youth" (this term is used often, e.g. in "youth leagues", but also in newspaper crime reporting.
It seems to be the term of choice when criminal acts are committed by minors, e.g..)
"juveniles" (common in many contexts, including crime reporting, e.g.)

The 2014-11-06 Baltimore Sun editorial
goes on at great length (eight paragraphs) making the case that, in its words,
as a society we need to recognize that
the sexual abuse of adolescent males by adult women
is never a laughing matter and that
parents need to be as alert to the danger of
predators in their midst who threaten their boys
as they are to those who threaten their girls.
Well, that seems to be the standard view of those in 2014
who are analyzing this matter.
But I want to recall the view from when I was a 15-year-old male, around 1960.
Back then, there was one prevailing view of such relations.
That was what was then called the "good mom",
a mom who would engage in sex with young men
for the purpose of both pleasure, hers and theirs, and education (in sex).
An extreme example of such a "good mom"
was the hypothesized and discussed mother of a high-school football player,
who would invite the members of her son's football team to her house for a party,
whose feature consisted of, well, I think you get the drift.
Such an activity even had a name back then, a "gang bang".

Did such activities actually occur?
I have no personal knowledge of any having occurred.
But I do have personal knowledge that they were discussed,
and never, NEVER, was it asserted that
all the awful harms discussed in the Baltimore Sun editorial
would befall the young men involved in such a (hypothetical) activity.
The potential harm that WAS discussed was
the risk of venereal disease being spread,
a very real risk then and now (depending on the use of condoms).

So I want to ask:
Just why was sex between minor men and adult women not considered
a psychological threat to the young men then,
but is now?
There really is a change in perceptions.

Many, if not all, of the articles describing this situation
quote "advocates for victims of sexual abuse"
who make, at least implicitly, what I consider to be
"quantification error", namely, not being sufficiently conscious of
the difference between "some" and "all".
No doubt it is true that some sex between adult women and teenage boys
has caused forms of psychological harm to some boys.
But I doubt very seriously that every boy in such a relation
has been harmed thereby.
If that were indeed the case, then
why is it only in recent years that this harm has been recognized?

If such harm were really widespread,
I simply cannot believe that it would not have been recognized
in the earlier "patriarchal" eras.
Would our patriarchal forbears have allowed their sons to be so harmed?
Doesn't sound very plausible to me.

I suspect very strongly this is yet another attempt
to pathologize and, in fact, criminalize
conduct which has gone on for centuries
without notable harm to the population.

Indeed, such patholgizing is clearly a growth industry,
leading to employment for legions of
"advocates" (e.g.) for those supposedly victimized,
and therapists for those who wish to complain they have been harmed.

While much of the commentariat seems to be following the lead of describing her as a
"rapist, sexual abuser, exploiter, manipulator, having a personality disorder, etc."
(e.g., the editorial in the Baltimore Sun),
I wonder what the opinions are
of the peers of the young man she is accused of raping.
It would be very interesting, I think, if, say, high school newspapers
would poll male high school students on what they think about this case.
Relevant questions would be:
"If she did indeed do the things alleged in the affidavit and indictment,
how would they describe the acts: rape, abuse, manipulation, or something else"
(giving them the opportunity to use their own terms to describe it).
It would be interesting to know
just how many of the people for whom these "advocates" claim to speak
share the views of the "advocates".
Would any high school newspaper be ballsy enough to run such a poll?
Or would the school administration squash it,
fearing what the response would be?

Miscellaneous Articles

Former Ravens cheerleader Molly Shattuck arrested, charged with rape of teen
By Emily Heil (coauthor of the Washington Post's gossip column, "The Reliable Source")
Washington Post "Reliable Source", 2014-11-05

2014 2005 2005

Molly Shattuck, the headline-grabbing estranged wife of prominent Baltimore businessman Mayo Shattuck,
was arrested Wednesday morning and charged with
rape and unlawful sexual contact with a teenage boy.

Shattuck, 47, an aspiring healthy-lifestyle guru who became the oldest NFL cheerleader when she joined the Ravens’ squad in 2005,
faces charges in Delaware,
where the alleged incident involving a 15-year-old boy is reported to have occurred.

Delaware police said the relationship between Shattuck and the boy
began in Maryland,
and culminated with Shattuck providing alcohol to minors
and engaging in a sexual relationship with the 15 year old male

at a vacation rental home in Bethany Beach”
over Labor Day weekend.

[Leaving aside the location,
when I was growing up there was a name for that behavior,
and it wasn't "rapist", "pedophile", or "criminal".
It was "being a good mom",
according to the desires and/or fantasies
of many of the teenage boys of my generation.
On the other hand, mothers of said teenage boys in some cases watched like hawks
to ensure that no such relationships could form
to distract, corrupt, or lead to "the eternal damnation" of their sons.]

She faces nine counts:
two of third-degree rape, four of unlawful sexual contact
and three of distributing alcohol to a minor.

Shattuck turned herself in to the Sussex County Superior Court,
and was released on $84,000 bond.
She will appear in court next on Dec. 3 for a case review.

Her attorney, Eugene Maurer, noted that
his client pleaded not guilty and maintains her innocence.
“Obviously, she is very distraught,” he said,
but declined to comment further
until he could review the case against Shattuck.

Baltimore’s NBC affiliate WBAL has the details from affidavits
outlining the accusations against the mother of three.
They say that she developed a relationship with a boy she first saw on Instagram
and that she later met him in person and invited him to stay with her, her children and friends of her children during the holiday weekend.

On Wednesday, the McDonogh School, a private school in Owings Mills, Md., attended by Shattuck’s children and the alleged victim,
released a statement saying that
on Sept. 24, Headmaster Charlie Britton was informed of
“alleged inappropriate behavior by a current parent toward a McDonogh student”
[Precisely the "good mom" activity of yesteryear.]
“immediately reported the allegations to the Baltimore County Police Department.”

“The parent has been prohibited from entering McDonogh’s campus
and additional security measures have been in place
to assure the safety of students
since the incident was reported,” the statement continues.

Delaware police say Baltimore police alerted them about the allegations against Shattuck on Sept. 26.
Delaware police said they then obtained a search warrant for her home,
where they seized unspecified “items pertinent to the investigation.”

[Personally, having been a teenage boy once,
I have serious doubts that sex between teenage boys and older women
is necessarily the evil thing that some seem to portray it as.
Teenage boys are, in many cases, intensely interested in learning about
this mysterious thing called "sex".
Who is better to teach them about it than an older woman?
(An example in culture:
the Marschallin and Octavian in Der Rosenkavalier.)
And what harm really is caused?

Speaking personally, my first experience with cunnilingus occurred when I was 17,
with a somewhat older woman, and I thank her for introducing me to that activity.
I most certainly do not feel I was harmed in any way by that experience.

As to Ms. Shattuck, I may be eternally damned for writing these words,
but it seems to me that in some ways she is an inspiring role model.
E.g.: (from the Baltimore Magazine story)]

Though she loves being active, Shattuck is a homebody at heart.
"I love to be home," she says.
"I love to cook, I love to bake, I love to do crafts,
and I'd much rather have a dinner party at home
than go to a restaurant."


Though she still coaches part-time, ultimately,
she hung up her [Baltimore Ravens cheerleader] uniform
for more time with her moppets.
"There's nothing better than looking out at 70,000 fans,"
says Shattuck,
"but it was an easy decision.
My kids were 4, 6, and 8 at the time,
and I needed to be there for them."

Though Shattuck could certainly be living a life of idle luxury,
she instead contributes to the community nearly every waking hour,
not just with money, but with her time, too.
She and Mayo are co-chairs of the United Way of Central Maryland.
She's a member of the Board of Overseers at the Baltimore School for the Arts
and is on the national advisory board for the The Johns Hopkins Children's Center,
to name just a couple of causes.
In fact,
her extensive involvement has earned her several awards for her charitable work.

Shattuck sees volunteer work
as something that should be an integral part of raising a family.
"You have to teach your kids to volunteer at a young age
and make it part of their lives," she believes.
"It teaches them to be nice to everyone.
It teaches them values in a real sense and not just the words."

[My thought: What a good mom!

Is it really necessary to bring criminal charges against this wonderful woman,
merely for having sex with a 15-year-old boy?]

A copy of the indictment is in a scrollable window here.

Molly Shattuck charged with rape and sexual contact with minor
By Julie Scharper and Jean Marbella
The Baltimore Sun, 2014-11-05

Molly Shattuck, the former Ravens cheerleader
who was married to onetime Constellation Energy CEO Mayo A. Shattuck III,
was arrested Wednesday and charged with third-degree rape
and unlawful sexual contact with a 15-year-old boy,
Delaware State Police said.

The 47-year-old mother of three, who has been active in local charities
such as the United Way of Central Maryland and the Baltimore School for the Arts,
is accused of giving alcohol to the boy, who is her son's classmate,
and performing oral sex on him
at a Delaware beach house over the Labor Day weekend,
according to an affidavit for a search warrant filed in Baltimore County District Court.

Shattuck was arraigned Wednesday morning [2014-11-05]
in Sussex County Superior Court in Georgetown, Del.
She pleaded not guilty and was released on $84,000 bond —
on the condition that she have no contact with the alleged victim
or other minors except her own children,
according to the Delaware attorney general's office.
She was also required to turn in her passport, officials said.

"She is maintaining her innocence,"
said Shattuck's defense lawyer, Eugene Maurer, of Wilmington, Del.
"She is obviously quite distraught."
Shattuck is due back in court Dec. 3 for a case review, Maurer said.

A Delaware grand jury handed up a nine-count indictment against Shattuck on Monday,
and it was unsealed Wednesday.
She was charged with
two counts of third-degree rape,
which carries a potential sentence of two to 25 years in prison on each count;
four counts of unlawful sexual contact in the second degree,
with a penalty of up to three years in prison, and
three counts of providing alcohol to a minor,
which carries a fine of $100 to $500
and could lead to an order of community service or imprisonment of up to 60 days.

lRelated Molly's solo act: Newly separated, focus is on new book and raising her family

According to the affidavit, the boy — a student at the McDonogh School —
told police that Shattuck began a flirtation with him
on the social networking site Instagram in May.

The Baltimore Sun does not name alleged victims of sexual crimes.

The McDonogh School issued a statement Wednesday saying that
administrators contacted police in late September
as soon as they learned of allegations involving a student
and a parent of another student.

"The safety and well-being of our students
is our greatest priority at all times,"
Headmaster Charles W. Britton wrote to parents of McDonogh students
in an email Wednesday.
The letter said the parent — who was not named — had been banned from campus.

Shattuck, a self-styled fitness and lifestyle guru
who was the oldest cheerleader in the history of the NFL,
began sending provocative messages to the boy in the spring
saying, "we would have fun together,"
according to the affidavit.

The two had sexual contact in the parking lot of a Columbia movie theater,
the affidavit said,
and also drove to a middle school parking lot
where they kissed in the back seat of Shattuck's Cadillac Escalade.

In the summer, she would pick up the boy during his lunch breaks from a class
and drive him to the parking garage of the T. Rowe Price building in Owings Mills
where they would "get in the back of the car and kiss or 'make out,' "
according to the affidavit.

Over Labor Day weekend, the boy joined Shattuck and her three children —
who range in age from 11 to 15 — and their friends
at a Bethany Beach rental home, according to the affidavit.
The boy, who had traveled to the beach separately,
asked his father for permission to spend the night with Shattuck's family.
Shattuck, documents say, assured the boy's father that
"there was no alcohol or drugs at the residence and she was the only adult."

However, she shared wine with the alleged victim
while he played "music and games" with the other boys,
according to the affidavit.
Around 2 a.m., Shattuck left the younger children asleep in the rental home
and took the alleged victim and other teenagers to a liquor store
and purchased Miller Lite and Bud Light beer for them, the document states.

Back at the house, Shattuck asked the alleged victim to help her walk the dog.
Once they got outside, she began kissing and fondling him,
then performed oral sex on him, according to the affidavit.
The boy then went up to a rooftop deck, where he and the other teens drank alcohol.

Shattuck then "came up and said that [the alleged victim]
needs to go to bed," according to the affidavit.

The boy then went into Shattuck's bedroom,
where she stripped to her underwear,
performed oral sex on him again
and told him she would be willing to have intercourse,
the affidavit states.
He decided to leave the bedroom.
The boy's father picked him up in the morning,
and the boy has not had contact with Shattuck since the incident,
according to the affidavit.

According to the letter from the headmaster of the McDonogh School,
he learned of allegations against a parent on Sept. 24.
Britton said in the letter that
he immediately reported the allegations to Baltimore County police.

"I want you to know that the parent
has been prohibited from entering McDonogh's campus," he wrote,
"and additional security measures have been in place
to assure the safety of our students since the incident was reported."

Delaware authorities said in a statement that
Baltimore County police contacted them Sept. 26 to report that
the 15-year-old had said he had an inappropriate relationship
with a woman later identified as Shattuck.

Delaware State Police searched Shattuck's North Baltimore home Oct. 1,
seizing items they identified as "pertinent to the investigation."
The affidavit gave police permission to seize
Shattuck's cellphone, computers and other electronic devices
as well as the "pink lace bra and underwear"
that the alleged victim said Shattuck wore at the beach house.

Howard County police said Wednesday that
the alleged incident at the Columbia movie theater
was not reported to authorities at the time.

Police are investigating the allegations,
said Howard police spokeswoman Sherry Llewellyn.

Baltimore County State's Attorney Scott D. Shellenberger said
his office had "reviewed the facts and the circumstances of the allegations"
but was deferring prosecution due to the "seriousness of the allegations in Delaware."

"Should additional facts come to light
or circumstances change in the case in Delaware,
this decision will be revisited," Shellenberger said.

A spokeswoman with the U.S. attorney's office in Baltimore said
Shattuck had not been charged by that agency.
The agency will neither confirm nor deny the existence of an investigation, she said.

No one answered Shattuck's front door —
still decorated with black and orange streamers for Halloween —
at her home Wednesday morning.
Neighbors either declined to comment or said they did not know the Shattucks well.

Mayo Shattuck, who before joining Constellation
was chairman of the board of Deutsche Banc Alex. Brown,
referred calls to a family spokesman, George P. Stamas,
also formerly with the investment firm.

"Mr. Shattuck is shocked and saddened about
the allegations against his ex-wife,
from whom he is divorced," said Stamas,
now a senior partner at the Kirkland & Ellis law firm in Washington.
"He is focused on the care and welfare of his children, who are with him,
and is deeply concerned about others affected by this.
He requests that the privacy of his children be respected."

Mayo Shattuck is now chairman of Exelon Corp.,
the Chicago-based energy giant that acquired Constellation in 2012.

Michelle N. Lipkowitz, a Baltimore-based attorney representing Molly Shattuck,
said her client has resigned from all of her nonprofit boards,
including the Baltimore School for the Arts, United Way
and the National Children's Museum.

"It is a difficult time for all involved," Lipkowitz said,
declining further comment.

The United Way of Central Maryland said Molly Shattuck,
who sat on their board and was "a longtime volunteer,"
is barred from any future participation with the organization,
according to spokeswoman Danielle Hogan.

The allegations about Molly Shattuck had circulated through Baltimore
for weeks before the indictment was handed up. As rumors spread,
a website promoting her book, "Molly Shattuck Vibrant Living,"
went into maintenance mode
and her various social media accounts were shut down.

"It's the talk of the town.
It's probably the most sensational thing that's ever hit Baltimore,"
said Lainy LeBow-Sachs,
executive vice president at the Kennedy Kreiger Institute
and a prominent player in the local philanthropic community."
I think it's a very sad time.
It's sad for the children and the family, and it's sad for her.
The whole thing is just pathetic."

Adam Rosenberg, executive director of the nonprofit Baltimore Child Abuse Center, said
people mistakenly tend to trivialize the impact of sexual abuse on a teenage male.
Speaking not about the alleged victim in the Shattuck case
but about teenage boys in general, he said,
"Even though he may look and act like an adult,
his brain is not there yet.
A 15-year-old doesn't know he is being manipulated,
he is being taken advantage of
and ultimately exploited."

Rosenberg suggested that parents
closely monitor their children's use of social media.

"It takes a community to protect children," he said.
"If other adults and children
are seeing behavior between adults and children that doesn't seem right,
they need to report it."

The former Molly Ann George grew up in
the small manufacturing town of Kittanning, Pa.,
about 50 miles northeast of Pittsburgh.
She was captain of the varsity cheerleading team
and voted most popular in high school.

She graduated from Indiana University of Pennsylvania in 1989,
where she majored in marketing.

She met her future husband in the mid 1990s
when she was working in marketing at Alex. Brown.
At the time, Mayo Shattuck
was president and chief operating officer of the investment bank.
Shattuck and his first wife, Jennifer, with whom he has two children,
divorced in 1995.
Molly and Mayo were married in 1997.

Molly Shattuck became the oldest cheerleader in NFL history
when she joined the Ravens squad at age 38 in 2005.
Her husband had been deeply involved in
the sale of a minority ownership position in the team about five years earlier.
Ravens spokesman Kevin Byrne declined to comment on the allegations.

She launched a health and exercise website, video and book called
"Molly Shattuck Vibrant Living."
The book, which was published in March,
offers a 21-day plan to
"transform your body, burst with energy, and live your life with purpose."

She appeared, with her mother, Joan George,
in a 2008 episode of the Fox reality show "Secret Millionaire."
Shattuck and George posed as low-wage workers in a Pennsylvania mining town,
got to know a few people who were in need, then, with the big reveal,
gave away close to $200,000 to those they had met.

In 2005, Molly Shattuck told The Sun that
she didn't have a serious boyfriend in high school
and skipped the senior prom to hike in the Grand Canyon.
She had seen other girls in her town marry young and never leave.

"I guess I was focused on other things," she said in the profile.
"I knew I was going to leave. I knew I was going to see the world."

[Concerning the statement:]

Adam Rosenberg, executive director of the nonprofit Baltimore Child Abuse Center, said
people mistakenly tend to trivialize the impact of sexual abuse on a teenage male.
Speaking not about the alleged victim in the Shattuck case
but about teenage boys in general, he said,
"Even though he may look and act like an adult,
his brain is not there yet.
A 15-year-old doesn't know he is being manipulated,
he is being taken advantage of
and ultimately exploited."


[I think that is pure BS.
The fact of the matter is that people are ready to have sex
when they are physically ready to conceive,
ovulation in the woman and ejaculation in the man.
Those acts are physical, biological signals that the person is physically and biologically ready for sex.
When people talk about "raging hormones" in teenagers,
they are acknowledging facts about the bodies of the people about whom they are talking.
Nature has made these people ready to conceive.

Now, it is certainly true that society disapproves of people that age having children.
We have established goals of "higher education" that extend far beyond the age of puberty.
The expectation is that pubescent youths will devote their energies to educating themselves,
not raising children.
(By the way, if you examine the history of the royal families of Europe,
e.g. by clicking on the monarchs mentioned here,
you will note the number of future kings and queens who were married in their mid-teens.)

But in earlier years, teen-age marriage was the norm, not the exception.
Which certainly gave young people an outlet for their sex drive within marriage.

Again, that talk about "his brain is not there yet"
is BS.
What is really true is that he may not yet be conditioned into the socially-approved ways of thinking.
That is a matter of conditioning, or as it is sometimes called socialization.

As to the "being manipulated, being taken advantage of, being exploited" point of view,
I think that many teenage boys would love to
be manipulated, taken advantage of, exploited
by a woman as lovely as Ms. Shattuck.
Again, the argument comes that they are too young to know they are being manipulated, etc.
But that is a matter of their brains being conditioned.
The argument for that:
I am quite sure there are many adult males
who would love to have been manipulated, etc. by a woman as lovely as Ms. Shattuck
when they were 15.]

Affidavits: Molly Shattuck accused of sex with teenager
Molly Shattuck indicted on 9 counts in Delaware, including rape
WBALTV, 2014-11-06

[The information in this
largely duplicates that in the Baltimore Sun story above,
but it does include a roughly five-minute video showing some of the relevant locations,
Ms. Shattuck and her legal team departing the courthouse,
and part of an apparent exercise video showing an extremely fit Ms. Shattuck
performing some bouncy exercises.
Not exactly my picture of a rapist.]

When the victim is a boy
Baltimore Sun Editorial, 2014-11-06

[The editorial begins:]

There was a time when an adolescent boy
who got seduced into a sexual relationship with an attractive older woman
was considered lucky.

[I thank the Baltimore Sun for stating that.
That was the point I tried to make above,
but it is good to see that at least some of the "elite"
has the same memory of the past.

But the editorial quickly continues with:]

But make no mistake:
There's a reason the law defines such liaisons as a crime.
When an adult — man or woman — lures a vulnerable minor into
a situation that allows him to be sexually exploited,
it's a form of abuse, not love,
and it can have serious consequences for the victim emotionally and psychologically.
No teenage boy ever was better off afterward
for having been the victim of sexual abuse by an adult.

[So here we are, in New Age Victomology.
There was a time, when I was growing up,
when young men were expected to be sturdier than the current victomologists assert,
not wounded "emotionally and psychologically" by merely having sex with an older woman.
Are today's young men really so fragile?

As to that final sentence
"No teenage boy ever was better off afterward
for having been the victim of sexual abuse by an adult."
that is somewhat of a tautology.
The question is, or should be,
"What constitutes sexual abuse?"
I certainly agree that it is possible
for even the most attractive woman
to sexually abuse another person, male or female, of any age.
Where I disagree is on
whether the acts described in the indictment against Ms. Shattuck
should be viewed as constituting sexual abuse.]

That's why authorities were right to take with upmost seriousness allegations that
Molly Shattuck, 47, the ex-wife of former Constellation Energy CEO Mayo A. Shattuck III,
engaged in a months-long sexual relationship with a boy young enough to be her son.
Ms. Shattuck was arrested on Wednesday [2014-11-05]
and charged with third-degree rape and unlawful sexual contact with
a 15-year-old boy identified as a classmate at the same school her son attends.

Ms. Shattuck,
who in recent years has emerged as something of a celebrity in her own right,
has pleaded not guilty to the charges,
and she must of course be accorded the presumption of innocence unless proven otherwise.
But the charges in her case, which involve
an older woman allegedly preying on a much younger boy
for sexual gratification,
[Whose sexual gratification?
It is alleged that she performed fellatio on the young man.
Precisely who, dear reader, and those opining on this matter,
gains sexual gratification from fellatio?
That women gain sexual gratification from fellatio has been
a standard plot line in porn movies,
e.g., Deep Throat.
Generally, I believe, advocates for women have debunked such assertions.

As to my belief, based on what I have thus far read about what Ms. Shattuck did,
I believe she did it to show the young man how much she cared for him.
Why else would she do it?
But that is just a guess, based merely on the statements in the indictment
and on my reading of her biography, which suggest real love (in a non-sexual way) for others.]

have revived an undercurrent of opinion questioning whether a teenage boy in such a situation
actually suffers any harm.
There's even a school of thought, rooted in the idea
that all males want to have sex whenever possible,
that suggests the experience of being seduced by a much older woman
actually may have been good for the boy.

[Well, here's another "school of thought",
based on my personal memory of my thoughts when I was a 15-year-old male.
I was intensely curious about this thing called sex,
which other people were engaging in but I had not.
I was curious about women's anatomy.
I was curious whether women could enjoy sex, and if so,
what would it take to make them enjoy sex.
I would have been delighted to have had an older woman
answer those questions, furthering my education.
It is interesting, and sad, that those people now discussing this matter
do not seem willing to admit the fact that many boys are indeed curious about sex.
Is answering curiosity such a terrible thing?]

Child psychologists and psychiatrists have long known such beliefs are a myth, however.
While it's true that many adolescent boys do occasionally fantasize about
having sex with an older, "experienced" woman —
a teacher, close relative or family friend —
there's a big difference between dreaming about such encounters
and actually participating in one, willingly or unwillingly.
Either way, the effect on how the youngster feels about himself,
his partner and women in general
is liable to be traumatic,
especially if the predatory adult is
someone he has been taught to trust
and who he believes will protect him.

[This really is a circular argument.
Of course sex with "predatory adults" is going to be harmful.
But what if the adult is not a predator,
but rather helping answer questions the youth has,
without causing harm to the youth?
Why should that be harmful,
any more than any other educational experience we inflict on our young?
(Personally, I found dissection in 9th grade biology intensely revolting,
and still shudder at the memory.
I think that was more "traumatic" to me
than any sex with an older lady
who was teaching, through actual experience, about sex
and the different ways it can be performed to please women
would have been.)]

The effects of that trauma can be mild or severe,
easily overcome or difficult to cope with.
Some victims experience guilt, shame, low self-esteem and anger
toward the perpetrator
while others may face more serious psychological disorders.
[Why on earth should sex cause "guilt, shame or low self-esteem"?
I can see absolutely no reason why having sex should lower anyone's self-esteem,
unless they had been taught that having sex was shameful.
Of course, that is what is behind all this line of thought:
That sex is shameful, thus if you are involved in a sexual act,
you have done something shameful.]

Victims can find themselves unable to establish bonds of trust
or set limits and boundaries on their own and others' behavior
because as youths their personal boundaries were invaded by someone they trusted.

Such feelings can cause victims to question their own sexuality
and inhibit their ability to participate in intimate relationships as adults.
Victims can blame themselves for having been exploited sexually
and struggle for years to overcome
the stigmatization, isolation and alienation attached to the abuse.
Many try to cope with such feelings by overuse of alcohol or drugs,
or by engaging in high-risk behaviors.

[Sure, if they view themselves as having done something shameful,
or if others push that point-of-view on them.]

It's important to recognize that
the effects of the sexual exploitation of minors vary widely,
depending on the severity of the abuse, how long it goes on
and, crucially, whether victims are supported by family and friends who acknowledge
the emotional toll exacted by the abuse
and the seriousness of the crimes committed against them.
[Again, note the use of the loaded words "exploitation" and "abuse",
and the evident assumption that those words apply to any and all sex
between adults and minors.]

Some youngsters are remarkably resilient
and can recover quickly with minimal counseling or other treatment,
while others have more difficulty adjusting.
But it's important to point out that
having been victimized as a child doesn't automatically mean
one's life is ruined forever.

Still, the belief that boys who are sexually exploited by predatory adult women
are somehow "lucky" to be victimized is a recurrent theme
whenever cases such as the one against Ms. Shattuck arise.
Regardless of the guilt or innocence of the alleged perpetrator in this case,
as a society we need to recognize that
the sexual abuse of adolescent males by adult women
is never a laughing matter and that
parents need to be as alert to the danger of
predators in their midst who threaten their boys
as they are to those who threaten their girls.

[I wonder how many of today's adult men
in fact did, back when they were minors,
engage in sex with adult women.
No doubt some have legitimate cause to claim they were victims,
but I suspect that there may well exist a sizable number
who enjoyed the practice.
It would be good, I think, if there were some way for them to step forward,
and say "Wait a minute. I had sex with adult women and it did not hurt me.]

Shattucks' divorce case quickly resolved, sealed
by Jayne Miller
wbaltv.com, 2014-11-07 (Friday)

An unusual step has been taken in the handling of Molly Shattuck's divorce case,
which was filed just as a criminal investigation started.

In Delaware, the indictment of Shattuck was sealed.
The WBAL-TV 11 News I-Team has learned the Shattucks' divorce case has been sealed,
according to court officials, by a judge in Baltimore County.

Shattuck is accused of performing a sex act on a 15-year-old boy
after a relationship with him that started through Instagram.
Shattuck appeared in court in Delaware on Wednesday to be arraigned,
post bail and plead not guilty to the charges.
The Office of Delaware Attorney General Beau Biden,
which brought the charges,
would not answer why the indictment was sealed when the grand jury returned it Monday.

The timeline of the criminal and civil cases begins on Sept. 25,
when the McDonogh School called police to notify of
a possible sex offense involving Shattuck and a student.

[Note that the indictment of Ms. Shattuck refers to alleged actions on August 31.
What happened between the alleged acts on August 31 and notification of the school on Sept. 25?
My guess, just a guess, is that the young man in question told his parents about what happened,
and they pondered over how to deal with his statements.
Ms. Shattuck was a well-regarded member of the Baltimore community,
surely taking actions which would bring her into disrepute
would not be steps they would take lightly.
On the other hand, if these charges were true,
there is always the concern that other youths might be next on her agenda.

Again, to be clear, this is just speculation on my part.
Perhaps later we will find out more about what happened.]

On Sept. 28, Delaware State Police took over the investigation
because the most serious allegation happened in Bethany Beach.

On 29, Shattuck filed for divorce,
but it's unknown whether she knew of the investigation at that point.

On Oct. 6, Mayo Shattuck filed for divorce.
His lawyer has told the 11 News I-Team that
he had heard rumors about his wife
but did not know the specific allegations.

On Monday [2014-11-03] at 1:24 p.m.,
a Delaware grand jury indicted Molly Shattuck.
That very same day at 1:30 p.m.,
Mayo Shattuck went to court in Baltimore County and was granted a divorce.

Lawyers who handle civil cases told the 11 News I-Team
that was faster than the norm
to be able to get a divorce in Maryland in 30 days.
People are typically advised it will take at least three months in uncontested cases
and much longer when there is a dispute.

Molly Shattuck -- ... -- is officially divorced
By Julie Scharper
The Baltimore Sun, 2014-11-10

Molly Shattuck --
the former Ravens cheerleader charged with
raping and sexually assaulting a 15-year-old boy --
is officially divorced.

An attorney for her ex-husband, former Constellation Energy CEO Mayo A. Shattuck III, said that
a Baltimore County Circuit Court judge signed the divorce order last week.
Online court records indicate
a final settlement conference took place Nov. 3,
with a final disposition date of Nov. 10.

"We had all of this together long before
the criminal charges were on the horizon,"
said Nicole Gilkeson, who represented Mayo Shattuck.
"We were working it out a long time ago."


Mayo and Molly Shattuck filed for divorce on Sept. 29.
A judge signed the final order on Nov. 3, Gilkeson said.

Gilkeson said the divorce was settled quickly because
none of the terms were in dispute.

"It was a really standard uncontested divorce," she said.

The initial divorce filing states that
Molly and Mayo Shattuck, who were married for 17 years,
have lived separately for more than a year.
[I.e., since at least Sept. 29, 2013.]
The pair agreed to a "Voluntary Marital Settlement Agreement"
that will "resolve all matters of every kind and character
arising from their marital relationship,"
the document states.

Friend Reacts to the Molly Shattuck Sex Scandal: 'It Really Boggles the Mind'
By Steve Helling
People, 2014-11-12

From the outside, Molly Shattuck appeared to live a charmed life.

Blonde and athletic, she was a pillar of her Baltimore community. Married since 1997 to mulitimillionaire Mayo Shattuck III, she lived in a well-kept mansion and raised three children, perfectly spaced two years apart from each other. She was devoted to exercise and clean eating. At 47, she still had a bikini body.

"She just had it all together,"
Laura Lancaster, who volunteered at some of the same charities as Shattuck did, tells PEOPLE.
"She dressed immaculately.
Her children were beautiful and they were dressed immaculately.
Her SUV was always shiny and perfectly clean inside.
She was always busy but always had a smile on her face.
I wanted her life; everyone did."

But Shattuck's life was far from perfect,
a fact everyone learned when she was accused of
having sex with a 15-year-old boy she met on Instagram.

The headlines practically wrote themselves. Shattuck, who had become a media sensation in 2005 when she became an NFL cheerleader at the age of 38, was back in the public eye. News outlets from Brazil to India covered the story.

"It has been surreal," Lancaster says.
"This is the same woman who went to PTA meetings
and volunteered for charities,
and now she's accused of doing something awful.
It really boggles the mind."

A Faltering Marriage

Several sources tell PEOPLE that
Mayo and Molly Shattuck had separated more than a year before her arrest,
although their divorce became final last week.

"The marriage just wasn't working out," a family friend says.
"They stayed together for a long time, even when it wasn't working.
It was hard on her to see her marriage falling apart,
and I think she would have gone back to him if he had asked.
She was struggling."

Adding to her struggles:
her husband, 60, had moved on and was seeing someone new.
"I'm not excusing anything she might have done,"
the family friend says,
"but it was a rough time for her.
She wasn't dealing with it well."

Shocking Allegations

Shattuck is accused of having sexual contact with a 15-year-old boy over Labor Day weekend,
according to court documents obtained by PEOPLE.
She has been charged with two counts of third-degree rape
and four additional charges of second-degree unlawful sexual contact.
She is also accused of providing beer to the victim and two other boys.

Shattuck's friends are reeling over the accusations.

"If you had asked me a month ago to describe Molly,
I would have told you that she's totally devoted to [her children],"
the family friend says.
"She would rather die than hurt her children,
which is why this hit me like a ton of bricks.
The Molly I knew wasn't capable of doing this."

Adds Lancaster:
"I read the accusations and couldn't believe what I was reading.
It just doesn't add up to make any sense.
I've never been so shocked in all my life."

Community Fallout

The news of the arrest reverberated through
the private school Shattuck's children attend –
and where she used to volunteer her time.
The headmaster of the school,
which charges between $24,350 and $27,100 per year for tuition,
sent a letter to the families of all the students.

"Information regarding alleged inappropriate behavior by a current parent towards a student was brought to my attention on September 24," he wrote. "I immediately reported the allegations to the Baltimore County Police Department. … The parent has been prohibited from entering the campus and additional security measures have been in place."

The letter blindsided many of the families whose children attended the school.
"It sounds like something you'd see in a soap opera,"
says Rose Herrera, whose grandson attends the high school.
"I can't say that I'm shocked that this type of thing happens in other places,
but I was surprised that it happened at that school."

Molly Shattuck resigned from all positions on numerous nonprofit charity boards. She sent a letter to the American Diabetes Association, where she had served as an outreach coordinator, and said that she was resigning "to devote more time with family." The United Way of Central Maryland also removed her from its board. "She will no longer participate in any volunteer activities," the group said in a statement.

Shattuck is out on $84,000 bond. As she prepares for a long legal process, friends tell PEOPLE that, guilty or not guilty, her life has changed permanently.

"I was most surprised because she had worked so hard for everything,"
the family friend says.
"She just seemed too logical to throw it all away like that."


Molly Shattuck attends hearing on sexual assault charges
By Julie Scharper
Baltimore Sun, 2015-01-07

Wearing a black pants suit and delicate silver cross earrings, Molly Shattuck looked grim as she appeared in a Delaware courtroom Wednesday morning for a hearing in the criminal case stemming from allegations that she sexually assaulted a 15-year-old boy.

The former Ravens cheerleader was twisting a tissue in her fingers and whispering to her attorneys, Eugene Maurer and Michelle N. Lipkowitz. She concentrated on a book of Christian motivational readings with headings such as, "Failure or stepping stone," and occasionally glanced at the reporters gathered in the courtroom.

Shattuck, 47, the ex-wife of former Constellation Energy CEO Mayo A. Shattuck, faces charges of third-degree rape and unlawful sexual contact from the incident, which allegedly occurred in a Bethany Beach rental property over Labor Day weekend. The mother of three has pleaded not guilty. She did not address the court at the hearing.

Shattuck sat in the courtroom with Lipkowitz while Maurer met with prosecutors privately. When he returned to the courtroom, he said, "It's OK," to her. Shattuck flashed him a tight, half-smile.

Judge Richard Stokes set the trial for March 23. A pre-trial hearing is scheduled for March 18.

"She looks thin," Maurer said of Shattuck outside the courtroom after the hearing. "It's stressful."

He also told reporters, "It's difficult. She's hanging in there."

He declined to say whether prosecutors had put forward a plea offer.

"The prosecutors and the defense are still talking and continue to talk as they do in all cases," he said.

Maurer also declined to say whether Shattuck continues to care for her children.

"I'd rather not talk about her personal life," he said.


Molly Shattuck sentenced to 48 weekends in community corrections center in Del. rape case
By Alison Knezevich
Baltimore Sun, 2015-08-21

A Delaware judge sentenced former Ravens cheerleader and fitness author Molly Shattuck on Friday to 48 weekends in a community corrections center for the sexual assault of a 15-year-old boy.

Shattuck, who pleaded guilty in June to a count of fourth-degree rape as part of an agreement with prosecutors, is to spend alternating weekends in a facility in Delaware for the next two years. She is required to register as a sex offender in Maryland and Delaware, and forbidden to be around anyone under the age of 18 other than her children.

The 48-year-old mother of three admitted to performing oral sex on the teenager last summer at a rented vacation house in Bethany Beach, Del. The boy had attended McDonogh School in Owings Mills with her son.

"I take full responsibility for what I did," Shattuck, 48, said between sobs as she stood before Judge E. Scott Bradley. "I was the adult."

Shattuck is the former wife of Mayo A. Shattuck, former CEO of Constellation Energy, the parent company of Baltimore Gas and Electric Co. She won fame as the oldest cheerleader in NFL history.

Dressed in a dark suit and polka-dot blouse, she entered the Sussex County Courthouse on Friday morning surrounded by a group of women as photographers and reporters snapped photos.

Shattuck appeared to be shaken throughout the proceedings. She was incomprehensible at times during her testimony. She rocked back and forth at the defense table as defense attorney Michelle N. Lipkowitz placed her hand on Shattuck's back.

Shattuck is to report to a Delaware violation-of-probation center during the first weekend of September, and return every other weekend for two years.

The sentencing order does not specify which center Shattuck must report to, said Carl Kanefsky, spokesman for the Delaware Department of Justice.

The 250-bed Sussex Violation of Probation Center in Georgetown is described on the state website as a "military-style, highly regimented program of discipline," with a "no-frills environment" in which offenders rise at 5 a.m.

The tan, warehouse-like building is part of a larger correctional campus run by the state, a few miles from the courthouse where Shattuck was sentenced.

"It's not a walk in the park," defense attorney Eugene Maurer told reporters outside the courthouse. He had asked the judge for probation, and called the sentence fair.

"[The judge] is punishing her … while at the same time not punishing her children," he said. Shattuck's children range in age from 12 to 16.

But her sentence drew criticism from some victims' advocates. Lisae C. Jordan, executive director of the Maryland Coalition Against Sexual Assault, called it "totally inappropriate."

"It's certainly a significant accommodation to a defendant to allow a sentence to be served on weekends, much less every other weekend," she said.

Raeann Warner, a civil attorney in Delaware who represents sexual abuse victims, said she was surprised by the sentence. She said many people tend to think that abuse by female perpetrators against male victims is less serious than it is.

"That's not fair or right, because boys are just as scarred by this," she said.

[Historically, males from the age of puberty on up
have been able to handle sexual relations without being "scarred".
Evidently many in our society view 17-year old men as far more psychologically fragile
than I think they really are.
For the record,
my first experience with oral sex (cunnilingus with an older female student)
was when I was 17 (and away from home, at college).
At the time, and ever since, I have viewed it as a delightful experience,
both for its ability to please the woman and as part of learning about sexual relations.
I would feel insulted if someone said "scarred" me.
How on earth did it hurt me?
Why on earth an "expert" (i.e., someone with an opinion and a Ph.D.)
should view such relations as "scarring" is beyond me.]

The judge heard emotional testimony from the victim's parents.

The boy's mother said Shattuck had stolen her son's innocence. She described changes in her son, who she said now finds it difficult to trust people.

"Miss Shattuck is a criminal," the victim's mother said. "She admits to being a rapist. ... She must be held responsible."

The teen's father recalled dropping his son off at the beach house. He asked Shattuck whether she could handle taking care of the big group of kids staying at the house. While he worried the teens could sneak out and find alcohol, he said, he never imagined Shattuck would violate his son.

Weeks later, he stood "elbow to elbow" with Shattuck at a school social event.

"That woman stood right next to me after having raped my son," the father said.

He said Shattuck reached out to his son through her own son with the message "Call my mom. She thinks you're hot."

The Baltimore Sun does not generally name victims of sexual assault.

Prosecutor John Donahue called the case a "classic" example of victim grooming. He said Shattuck groomed the teenager for three months before the incident at the vacation house.

"This was not an interaction between two adults," said Donahue. He asked Bradley to incarcerate Shattuck.

Sentencing guidelines in the case called for up to 22 months for the fourth-degree rape charge. Shattuck faced other charges that were dropped as part of the plea agreement.

Maurer, the defense attorney, said Mayo Shattuck had left Molly Shattuck for a younger woman, which was a blow to her psyche.

Later Friday, an attorney for Mayo Shattuck called the claim "completely erroneous."

"After the hearing, Molly apologized to Mayo for that comment by her lawyer, which she said came as a shock to her," attorney Sandy Ain told The Baltimore Sun.

Maurer, reached late Friday, declined to comment.

Ain said his client had no comment on the sentence his former wife received.

"Mayo's principal goal is to protect his children and to have his privacy protected as much as possible," Ain said. "The whole episode has been disastrous for the family and for their children."

In handing down the sentence, Bradley said he couldn't imagine what either the victim or Molly Shattuck have been through.

"This is a difficult case," he said.

The judge sentenced Shattuck to 15 years in prison — the maximum sentence for the charges — with all but two years suspended. The two years are to be served as probation, with the alternating weekends in the Delaware facility. She also will be required to pay more than $10,000 in restitution.

As the courtroom emptied after the sentencing, Shattuck collapsed into a chair.

Baltimore Sun reporter Justin Fenton contributed to this article.

No charges against Shattuck in Baltimore County
By Alison Knezevich
Baltimore Sun, 2015-09-04

Baltimore County's top prosecutor says he will not pursue criminal charges against former Ravens cheerleader and fitness author Molly Shattuck after re-examining allegations of sexual abuse involving a teenage boy.

State's Attorney Scott Shellenberger said Friday that his office has spoken with a representative of the victim's family.


When Shattuck was arrested last November, authorities said she would pick the boy up from class and take him to a parking garage at the T. Rowe Price building in Owings Mills, where they would "kiss or 'make out'" in the back of a car.

The boy, who was 15, attended McDonogh School in Owings Mills with Shattuck's son.

Shellenberger said in a statement that he decided against pursuing additional charges against Shattuck "after careful consideration of all relevant facts and circumstances including the nature of the allegations of what occurred in Baltimore County, as well as the recently concluded prosecution in Delaware."

He declined to comment further.


Some victims' advocates have said the Delaware sentence was too light. Prosecutors sought jail time, and sentencing guidelines called for up to 22 months for the fourth-degree rape charge.

Shattuck originally faced other charges — including providing alcohol to a minor — that were dropped as part of her plea agreement.

Shattuck was required to register as a sex offender in Delaware and in Maryland for 25 years.

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